Ever had a friend/colleague/family member/anyone tell you how miserable or tough their current situation was and after seeking advice from various people (including you) they end up doing absolutely nothing to change their situation?
I sure have.
I would go as far as to say that people who think about doing something (but don’t end up doing it) are more common than people who actually go out and do it.
A majority of the time fear, amongst other things which are often fear in disguise, stops people in their tracks.
Once people get stuck in a comfort zone, if they’re not willing to change their mindset there’s nothing anyone can say or do to change their situation. Some people actually get addicted to the drama, and (unconsciously) enjoy whining and bitching about their lives to others. They expect that their friends would want to join them in the dumps, and many people ride that victim mentality bus together.
Misery loves company.
Unfortunately that’s the way that many people are wired, and often they don’t realise it.
I was challenged with this a while ago with some of my friends, and even with my parents. The hard approach will only work with those who are ready to accept it. One approach will not fit all.
So then the choice comes down to:
a) are you willing to risk the friendship by telling them the cold hard truth, or
b) will you realize that you can’t change anyone other than yourself and simply encourage them to work it out and perhaps offer some subtle suggestions?
Whatever the case, if the negativity is pulling you down then you may need to go find some new friends or hang around more positive people (the less talk more action individuals).
Another way to look at it, what are YOU doing to attract the negative people? All our relationships are reflections of something going on within ourselves.
You want them to change their situations, but what are you doing to change yours?
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