Here’s an interesting perspective on social interaction - specifically our (being the general populations’) apparent or fading  inability to communicate i.e. to carry an intimate conversation.

The author writes:

Real conversation requires full presence. It requires listening and empathy.
A great conversation opens up spaces in your mind, it helps you mine thoughts even you didn’t know you had. Few pleasures can rival that.

I agree wholeheartedly, and even though there is some truth behind "the death of conversation" what I’ve been discovering lately (particularly in the past six to eight weeks) is that when somebody (i.e. me) is in a space where I am able to be open and honest - then whoever I am conversing with reciprocates.

Now of course it was also important to really identify who I wanted to connect with. I set myself a goal to connect with at least one person every week, and I mean to really connect. We’re talking no holds barred what the heck has been happening with you? I want the real story type conversations.

I’m happy to report that I’ve had great success. Furthermore it’s not only been with friends, but with strangers too. Such as the time I had a lengthy discussion with the lady in the US Customs queue at LA Airport.

So what’s the secret to healthy and meaningful conversation?

Well for me it was a simple of case of not wanting more of the same pointless chatter. I’ve got more than enough of that in my own head, so having more of it in my physical existence wasn’t really adding any value to my life.

Translating that to the real world (I’ll spare you any Matrix - like commentary here) what that meant was a lot of commitment, effort, and vigilance on my part. The vigilance came in the form of overcoming silly notions in my head that people "may be too busy"; and eliminating destructive thoughts such as "it’s  been too long so we’ll have nothing to talk about" or "they might think I’m crazy". Seriously, pay attention to it and hit the [ignore] button.

I sent out dozens of emails asking specific people if they wanted to catch up, frequent follow-up and then I proceeded to make appointments with those that I sensed were in a similar mental and spiritual space.

It sounds weird I know, but what was more intriguing was the fact that when the lunches, dinners and coffees did occur - they were absolutely amazing.

By sharing who I am and where I am at this point in my life I unconsciously opened up a space for them to trust me and share themselves fully. Sometimes I left the conversation thinking to myself,  "wow, did that actually just happen?" and it really did!

That which is like unto itself, is drawn… Esther Hicks.

So next time you’re thinking "I could do with a real quality talk right about now" go out and make it happen. It’s easier than you may think.